Rihanna has gotten badder since her 2007 album, “Good Girl Gone Bad.”
In her newest music video for “B**tch Better Have My Money,” RiRi is certainly not wielding something as basic as umbrellas.
The title of the song alone is NSFW. When the video debuted Wednesday night, fans hoping for something raw weren’t disappointed.
But in a world where risqué and violent content is increasingly present on television and the Internet, just how NSFW is “B**tch Better Have My Money,” really? Is it, like, “SFW if you have headphones on”? Is it, maybe, “SFW if you have headphones on and skip that one part and maybe that other sequence”?
Essentially: Will you be called up to HR if you watch this music video at your office? We did the dirty (really, really dirty) work for you in this breakdown. Warning: Definite spoilers ahead.
These are the first things you see. They’re signs of things to come.
Timestamp: 0:00
NSFW Rating: Eyebrow raise from your cube neighbor
An unidentified woman enters the room and walks around her sofa in a transparent bra. For the record, the song hasn’t even started playing yet.
Timestamp: 0:47-1:00
NSFW Rating: Probable HR violation
During what’s definitely not a breezy convertible ride, said woman is strewn across the backseat — and you see her in the buff.
Timestamp: 1:49-1:56
NSFW Rating: Definite HR violation
She’s then hung upside-down and swung back and forth while Rihanna…chats on the phone?
Timestamp: 1:59-2:10
NSFW Rating: Pack up your boxes.
A yacht party ensues!
Timestamp: 2:48-3:27
NSFW Rating: Surprisingly, SFW
If you were wondering where the drugs were, they are in this scene. All the drugs. All of them.
Timestamp: 3:47-4:27
NSFW Rating: We’re not talking ibuprofen.
This epic climax of the music video includes weapons, a rubber?/plastic?/see-through dress, so much blood, and the word “f***ed” on the screen (we added the asterisks).
Timestamp: 4:46-5:59
NSFW Rating: Look up the definition of “NSFW”; you will see this music video title.
After the screen goes black, in a curtain call of sorts, we see Rihanna lying naked…bloody…on a pile of money, while smoking what’s most likely a blunt (we cannot confirm it’s a blunt).
Timestamp: 4:46-5:59
NSFW Rating: Artistic. And NSFW.
Final verdict: you probably shouldn’t watch this at work. But you definitely should when you leave.
