All Harry Potter fans wait for the Hogwarts acceptance letter that they will never receive and dream of the house they want to join. You can hope to be part of Gryffindor all you want, but the choice belongs to the Sorting Hat. Now, instead of traveling the long journey to magic school, Muggles everywhere can consult a Twitter bot that will decide for you.
Boston-based Internet artist Darius Kazemi is the wizard behind creating a modern day Sorting Hat. Kazemi works at the technology company Bocoup and dedicates the rest of his time to creating fun digital programs, like generating pick-up lines that will probably work on no-one. His other recent online projects include a bot that tweets random old school hip-hop flyers and a browser version of the popular video game Wolfenstein 3D.
The Boston Globe profiled the Kazemi, a 30-year-old who lives in Somerville and works as a computer programmer by day. Creating online art in his spare time, the Globe says that he “has emerged as one of the most closely watched and pioneering figures at the intersection of technology, cultural commentary, and what feels to many like a new kind of Web-native art.
Just follow the Twitter account and you’ll soon discover where you truly belong.
Will you be able to land a spot in the honorable Gryffindor?
@bryanduxbury Your nominee is like a rig, your hope is like a fore This fateful day’s the day you join the house of Gryffindor!
— The Sorting Hat Bot (@SortingBot) April 6, 2015
@glitterframes Your thigh is rapt, your waist distraught, yet you are not forlorn From this unfailing recipe, a Gryffindor is born! — The Sorting Hat Bot (@SortingBot) April 6, 2015
Don’t be afraid to be in Slytherin.
@the_garden_of Your breast is rough, your ear direct, yet you are not afraid From this unwilling recipe, a Slytherin is made!
— The Sorting Hat Bot (@SortingBot) April 6, 2015
@Aiantheen I am the Hogwarts Sorting Hat, I see you when you cut I’ve figured out that Slytherin’s the house to put your butt — The Sorting Hat Bot (@SortingBot) April 6, 2015
What is a Hufflepuff anyway?
@nadineblong The stinging of a parakeet, the anger of a bat In Hufflepuff is where you go since you are rather flat
— The Sorting Hat Bot (@SortingBot) April 6, 2015
@zaidos Your candlelight is like a bulb, your rink is like a muff From this day forth a member of the house of Hufflepuff! — The Sorting Hat Bot (@SortingBot) April 6, 2015
Apparently, it’s up to your grandma to see if you deserve a Ravenclaw title.
@risaseidman The Sorting Hat is who I am, gaze upon my stamp For Ravenclaw you cast your lot because your gram is tramp
— The Sorting Hat Bot (@SortingBot) April 6, 2015
@houlieoin The Sorting Hat is who I am, my fingerprint is snug I’m putting you in Ravenclaw, since you are very smug — The Sorting Hat Bot (@SortingBot) April 6, 2015
The Sorting Hat may not be pretty, but don’t judge what you see. You won’t find a smarter hat and that is something we can all agree.
[h/t Uproxx]
