Laser Beams, Local Beers, and More Events in Boston This Weekend

Mmmmmm… waffles. If pancakes are like a nice pair of pants, waffles are like the same pair of pants with a ton of cargo pockets full of butter and syrup. But in our carb-conscious times you can only crush waffs four or five times a year, tops, and the rest of the time your waffle iron sits on top of the refrigerator collecting dust. Author Daniel Shumski decided to throw some other foodstuffs in there and see what happens, and he’ll stop by Brookline Booksmith (with samples!) to talk about the resulting recipe book, “Will It Waffle?” Steak? Yes! Pizza? Yes! Apple pie? Yes! Daniel Shumski’s man-parts? No no no oh God I’ve really been spending too much time with the waffle iron. (5 p.m., FREE, all ages)

Central Square laser-cutting, laser-engraving, and 3D-printing shop danger!awesome celebrates the opening of their new downstairs workshop space with two nights (Thursday and Friday) of equipment demonstrations, snacks, music, and entertainment. This is pretty straightforward: They have lasers, you want to see some lasers in action, and maybe even get a really cool design engraved into your iPhone. And while they’re at it maybe they can laser a few cracks into the screen so you look like you’re too cool to take care of nice things. (6 p.m., $15, all ages)

If you have to go to a courthouse, odds are you’re going to have a bad time. Either you’re on trial or you have jury duty or you’re a lawyer spending all day addressing a judge as “your honor” even after you’ve personally witnessed him leaving the bathroom without washing his hands. The only guy having fun in the courthouse is the bailiff because he gets to say “All rise!” and people actually listen to him, for once. Except everyone’s going to enjoy themselves at the Sustainable Business Network’s fifth annual Local Craft Brew Fest at the Moakley Courthouse on the waterfront, showcasing more than 80 varieties of craft beer, spirits, cider and mead. (6 p.m., $47, 21+)

One part scavenger hunt, one part bike ride, one part food drive, and unfortunately zero parts Jason Statham, the first annual Cranksgiving harnesses the power of the local cycling community to help the Greater Boston Food Bank and the Somerville Homeless Coalition. Riders will take off from Copley Square, navigating the streets of Boston and the aisles of grocery stores to find specific food items (registration is free, but you’ll need about $15 to purchase items). Then race to finish line to donate your food and enjoy the after-party at Aeronaut Brewing Company. (1 p.m., FREE, all ages)

What’s the only thing missing from your basement ping pong tournaments? Pole dancers, right? Oh, you were going to say a cool electronic scoreboard? Sorry, pole dancers it is! Poles ‘n Paddles brings together two things that have nothing in common except for the first letter at Blazing Paddles at Game On! near Fenway, as out-of-shape manchildren face off in a ping pong tournament while pole-dancing artists amaze the crowd with gravity-defying feats of core strength. (7:30 p.m., $10-15, 21+)

You’ve probably heard the statistic that only New York has more artists per capita than Somerville. There’s even a guy who stencils “NOT ART” on stuff all over town, and that counts as art. But now that even the New York Times is writing about the wonders of the ‘ville, it’s in danger of pricing out the very artists that made it cool in the first place. So stop by the Brickbottom Artists Association’s Open Studios this weekend and check out the live-work spaces of more than 60 artists, and maybe buy a piece or two and consider it your contribution to keeping Somerville weird. (12 p.m., FREE, all ages)

The fourth annual Boston Anarchist Book Fair fair returns to what it calls “one of North America’s cradles of revolution.” Um, “one of”? Boston is the cradle, the crib, the stroller, and the Baby Bjorn of revolution in this country (Philadelphia is, I don’t know, an extra car seat that you leave in your mother-in-law’s car?) Anyways, what they’re trying to say is that it’s fitting Boston would host the gathering of radical organizations, vendors, and community members for two days of learning and organizing for a better Boston and better world. Or at least a world where you don’t feel pressured to vote because of a dumb Facebook button. (10 a.m., FREE, all ages)

Photo credit: danger!awesome/Facebook

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This article was provided by our content partner, The Boston Calendar.