Craigslist for the Big Screen takes a local Craigslist post (from a Missed Connection to a Rant & Rave) and brings it to life, theoretically “adapting” it for the big screen. This week…
Wanted – artistic, creative, expressive woman for tickling $100/hour (Brighton)
FADE IN:
A doorbell rings OVER BLACK.
INT. APARTMENT – AFTERNOON
RICHARD (late 30s), a slender man with glasses and reptilian features, stands by the door and breathes deep. After a moment, he opens the door of his apartment to find REBECCA (mid to late 20s), a gorgeous young woman with lush dark hair and piercing green eyes, leaning against the wall in the hallway outside. She chews neon green gum and wears a leather overcoat with boots to match.
She blows a bubble with the gum. She turns her head and appears to stare into his very being. The bubble POPS. Richard’s eyes run wild.
REBECCA
I don’t like to be kept waiting.
She pushes past him and steps into the apartment. The apartment has promise but is quite messy, with clothes, papers, empty food cartons, etc. scattered across the floor. From the contents of the rest of the apartment, it appears that he’s some kind of artist.
RICHARD
Um, excuse me? Who are you?
He lingers in the doorway with the door still open.
REBECCA
My name’s Rebecca.
She drops her bag on a coffee table.
RICHARD
Well, what happened to Melissa? You’re not the girl from the picture, the one I spoke to.
REBECCA
She wasn’t feeling too well. So I told her that I’d take her place.
He shakes his head.
RICHARD
Yeah, well, that’s not what I agreed to. We had everything worked out. The clothing and everything.
He motions to the door.
RICHARD
I think you better leave.
She peers at him. She takes the gum out of her mouth and sticks it on the underside of the coffee table. She struts over to the door, slams it shut, and locks it.
Richard steps back with his hands up.
RICHARD
Hey, I don’t know what you think you’re doing. I don’t want any trouble. Just wanted some light fun.
Rebecca pulls a rag out of her pocket and holds it behind her back. She then drops her coat to reveal a skimpy S&M outfit.
REBECCA
Just some light fun, huh?
He smirks.
RICHARD
Umm..
She slowly but precisely approaches him. He stands still but appears to be shaking like an eager child. She reaches him and smirks. She strokes his arm.
Then SUDDENLY she pulls the rag out and holds it over his mouth.
INT. APARTMENT – LATER
Richard’s eyes desperately blink open. It takes him a moment to realize that he’s tied up on the floor of his apartment in nothing but his underwear. He writhes around.
RICHARD
Hello?! Somebody help!
Rebecca walks into his line of sight. She holds her finger up to her lips.
REBECCA
Better keep quiet.
RICHARD
What’re you doing? What do you want with me? I have the money in my wallet. Just take it and go, please.
She walks over to her bag on the coffee table.
REBECCA
Oh, I will. But first…
She pops open her bag and reaches her hand in.
REBECCA
I thought you wanted some tickling?
SUDDENLY she pulls out a feather duster. Richard’s eyes go wide.
RICHARD
No, no, no! Please.
She approaches him.
REBECCA
Isn’t that what your ad said? You wanted some light, fun tickling?
RICHARD
Not for me! Not for me! Please, just put it away. I can give you more money.
REBECCA
It’s too late for that, Dick.
She brings the feather duster to his side. He screams.
RICHARD
Please, please, please! I’m begging you.
She smirks and tickles him with the feather duster. His eyes bulge out of his head. He continues to both shriek and laugh. Rebecca cackles.
FADE OUT.
