Here’s where I’m supposed to make a joke about how tomorrow’s the first day of spring so of course it’s going to snow here, haha right? Winter ain’t giving up that easily! The Earth’s revolution around the sun has come to an abrupt stop and we’re mired in a seemingly permanent winter, spring is canceled, summer is canceled, humanity is making a mad dash to the warmer areas of the planet and their rich natural resources, haha! Don’t put away that winter coat just yet!
Thursday to Sunday, March 19-22 – Irish Film Festival |
This year’s Irish Film Festival hits the Somerville Theatre from Thursday to Sunday with features, shorts, director Q&As, and post-screening parties. If you’re like me and your favorite part of watching foreign films is pointing out actors from American television shows, don’t miss Maisie Williams (Arya from Game of Thrones) in Best Feature winner Gold, tonight with director Niall Heery in person. (Various times, prices, and ages)

Thursday to Sunday, March 19-29 – Boston Design Week |
Everything around you was consciously designed by someone, unless you’re standing naked in the middle of the wilderness, in which case how are you even reading this oh god get out of my head GET OUT OF MY HEAD. Boston Design Week — which actually runs for 11 days, come on they’re designers not mathematicians — celebrates all aspects of design, from interior decorating to photography to food design. More than 80 (mostly free) events in the city and suburbs include exhibitions, artist talks, open houses, behind-the-scenes tours, and lots more. (Various times, prices, and ages)

Friday to Sunday, March 20-22 – Strange Days |
Exiled Theatre presents Strange Days: Five Tales Concerning Dark Paths, Odd Mercies, and Birthday Cake, a production of five short plays in two acts at Central Square’s Green Street Studios. If you’re worried about something scary happening that ruins birthday cake for you forever, you’re lucky it wasn’t already ruined at your ninth birthday party when your mom gave the biggest frosting rose to your stupid cousin, like hello, it’s not his birthday, I didn’t see him behind the counter at Papa Gino’s making his own pizza because they only let the birthday boy do that and oh right, that was me. The show runs Friday to Sunday each of the next three weekends. (Various times, $20, 14+)

Saturday, March 21 – Bach in the Subways |
Berklee School of Music students celebrate Johann Sebastian Bach’s 330th birthday (OK, technically the 330th anniversary of his birth, he’s not still alive, feel free to go for the big frosting rose) with a Bach in the Subways performance Saturday at South Station under the big schedule board, which actually still lists some Franklin Line trains delayed from 330 years ago. What have you ever done to make sure people will be celebrating your birth 330 years from now? I mean, sure, there’s that time you went to the Bach concert at South Station and you had to use the bathroom so you told your friends, “Wait here — I’ll be right Bach.” And everyone laughed and laughed and strangers looked over and wished they knew what was so funny, or just knew you a little bit, because you’re obviously going places. (2 p.m., FREE, all ages)

Saturday and Sunday, March 21-22 – Whiskey Rebellion Boston |
If you celebrated St. Paddy’s Day with a few shots of Irish whiskey, but Whiskey Rebellion Boston is here to remind you the best whiskey comes from the good old U.S. of A. Did you know Ireland and America spell it “whiskey” but Canada and Japan spell it “whisky”? Moksa hosts the showcase of American-made whiskeys, with sessions on Saturday and Sunday featuring cocktail demonstrations, snacks, and of course, tastings. There are also classes about the history and chemistry of whiskey, but they’re already sold out, which is fine because why fill your brain cells up with knowledge if you’re just going to kill them anyway? You probably already forgot my fun fact about the spelling thing. (2:30 p.m., $42, 21+)

Sunday, March 22 – Silent(ish) Reading Party |
Ain’t no party like a silent reading party ‘cuz a silent reading party don’t stop until I finish this chapter and/or run out of Sleepytime Tea. Organized by JP Reads and Social Artists & Writers, Sunday’s gathering at the Loring-Greenough House is actually a Silent(ish) Reading Party, because what better way to strike up a conversation with a reader than asking “What are you reading?” And then when they start to answer you interrupt and say “I read Infinite Jest. Twice.” So they know you’re not messing around about this reading stuff. (2 p.m., FREE, all ages)

Sunday, March 22 – Hardcore Helps the Homeless |
Hardcore Helps the Homeless brings together five of Boston’s best hardcore bands at O’Brien’s Pub to benefit the Somerville Homeless Coalition. The lineup features lunglust, Kimachi, Empty Vessels, Vultures, and Mass Graves, and we can only hope that Kimachi translates to something really intense and badass like the other band names. Come out and hear some aggressive music but probably keep the “Be! Aggressive! Be! Be! Aggressive!” cheers to yourself, unless you’re talking about being aggressive in fixing the homelessness problem, in which case, more power to you. (8 p.m., $10, 18+)
Photo credit: Irish Film Festival Boston
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