Theater/Performance Art
Theater/Performance Art

COMMENTARY

“One movie cannot contain him.”
– Roger Ebert, 2001 review of Shrek

As I type this, there are men in America who dress up and perform as Shrek every night for a living.

Soliders fight overseas for these Shreks. These Shreks are taxed by their government accordingly for their Shrek-related activities. These Shreks are our fathers, our brothers, our tour guides at local museums when productions of Shrek aren’t happening. They are us, if we were Shrek.

As I type this, there is also an editor who would allow an adult writer to see Shrek: The Musical five times in a row at Wheelock Family Theatre in a mentally taxing endurance activity we’ll call #shrekweek — an action that makes it hard for me to look in the mirror. That is, until I put on my Shrek ears, which are hilarious.

So how has Shrek, a film intended as a sucker-punch to Disney fairytale juggernauts and loaded with early-aughts topical references, somehow followed us all the way into 2015?

Let’s go on a disturbing journey together. More

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Commentary
mbtaday
This Free T Day, I Tried to Cost the MBTA as Much Money as Possible
Commentary

Last Friday, the MBTA rewarded customers who suffered through a winter’s worth of cancellations and delays with a free day of service across all platforms. Coupled with T-related giveaways from local organizations and a 15% discount on all passes for the month of May, it was the MBTA’s grand gesture to build up some goodwill. More

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Restaurants
Mi Casa Tu Casa - 299 Hancock Street
Hidden Gems: 10 of Dorchester’s Lesser Known Dining Spots
Restaurants

What has Dorchester given us? Well, Whitey Bulger, the Wahlbergs, Herb Chambers, and Mayor Marty Walsh for starters. Take the good with the bad there, but essentially all of Boston’s royalty hails from Dot.

One thing we can all agree on is that Dorchester’s food is very, very good. The city’s largest neighborhood is diverse, which offers the opportunity to grab some great options that you can’t seem to find within such close proximity anywhere else.

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News
You Won’t Be Able to Look Away From the Aquarium’s New Baby Penguin
News

World Penguin Day — unarguably the world’s cutest holiday — is this Saturday, and our city’s own aquarium has something extra to celebrate. A baby little blue penguin is growing bigger and stronger behind closed doors at the New England Aquarium, while it spends more time with the ‘rents and weighs in with the staff before making its exhibit debut. More

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food
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All 18 Mike’s Pastry Cannoli, Ranked From Worst to Best
food

To a Boston resident, the blue and white pastry box neatly tied with a piece of string is as familiar as the Prudential Tower or the Citgo sign. No matter where you are in the city, it’s practically impossible to escape the sight of Mike’s Pastry. Few feelings rival the excitement of untying the string that separates you from a coveted cannoli and, more importantly, that heavenly first bite.

Home to 18 cannoli flavors ranging from Hazelnut to Mint Chip, people line up in the bakery, out the door, and spill onto Hanover Street for all kinds of pastries, but let’s be honest, mostly the cannoli. And so, for the greater good, we took it upon ourselves to taste and subjectively rank all 18 Mike’s Pastry cannoli to find out which one reigns supreme. 
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TV
gerrywoo
The Mystery Behind Matt Damon’s Weird Email Address, Solved
TV

Thanks to Wikileaks creating a searchable index of the leaked Sony emails, we now know Ben Affleck asked Harvard Professor Henry Louis Gates to remove mention of his slave-holding ancestor from Gates’s PBS series, Finding Your Roots.

We also know Matt Damon wrote an email to Harvard president Drew Faust advocating for a prospective student’s admission to the college, which caused some confusion among Harvard staff because it came from Damon’s personal email, an oddly named Earthlink account.

And now we’ve solved the mystery behind Damon’s email address, an inside joke between him and Casey Affleck about an obscure R&B singer from the ’80s revealed in a 2002 interview with the Boston Phoenix. But first, some background. More

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BDCWire
gotsand2
Sand Snakes Don’t Need an Army to Start a War on ‘Thrones’
BDCWire

SPOILER ALERT: Major plot points of Game of Thrones are revealed in this post.

The Sand Snakes made their much anticipated debut on Sunday’s Thrones. And if their spear-throwing skills are any indication of what’s to come, the Lannisters should get ready to suck out some venom.

So far, we’ve only been introduced to Ellaria Sand—the paramour of the late Oberyn Martell and mother of their eight bastard daughters. In the season premiere, Ellaria approached Prince Doran Martell in the Water Gardens of Dorne, expressing her desire to torture the captive Myrcella Baratheon. The very person Jaime Lannister and Ser Bronn are traveling to Dorne to rescue.

After sailing ashore at night and falling asleep on the beach, Jaime wakes up to find Bronn bringing a sword down towards his head—killing a red viper. Merely a coincidence that Oberyn Martell was referred to as “The Red Viper of Dorne”? I think not!

gotsnake

This brush with death results in both men waxing poetic about how they’d like to go—in a deathbed watching his sons grovel over his fortune for Bronn, in the arms of the woman he loves for Jaime—until a legitimately lethal scenario presents itself. A battle breaks out between Jaime and Bronn and four Dorne soldiers on horseback.  A sword to Jaime’s prosthetic hand later, the soldiers are killed and a new mode of transportation presents itself.

“These Dornean stallions can ride day and night without tiring,” Bronn says. “We’ll ride to the Water Gardens with a nice breeze on our face.”

Not if it was up to the Sand Snakes.

gotsword

Returning home for the first time since meeting with Prince Doran, Ellaria reunites with three of her daughters: Tyene, Nym and, the baddest chick of them all, Obara. She asks her mother if war is at hand and Ellaria responds that Doran refuses to do anything but weep for Oberyn. They’ll have to avenge his death on their own. Obara reminds her that they have no army to march against the Lannisters without Doran’s support but Ellaria isn’t having any of that.

“We don’t need an army to start a war.”

Finger snap.

“We have a problem,” Obara says, cracking her whip and knocking over a barrel to reveal a man buried up to his neck in sand. “This ship captain found me in Planky Town, telling me he had information to sell. He told me he smuggled Jaime Lannister into Dorne.”

The Sand Snakes realize Jaime is in Dorne to rescue his daughter (…and niece).

“If he gets to her before we do,” Ellaria tells her daughters. “We lose our only chance for revenge. We must choose. Doran’s way and peace. Or my way and war.”

Obara promptly hurls a spear through the ship captain’s head. Ellaria’s way, it issssss.

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Science
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Why Doesn’t Chewbacca Have Grey Hair in the New ‘Star Wars’ Trailer?
Science

All was right in the galaxy when Harrison Ford made his epic return as Han Solo with his sidekick Chewbacca in the new Star Wars: The Force Awakens trailer. In the clip, we see that Han Solo has aged with time but one Twitter user noted that his side-kick Chewbacca seems to remain exactly the same.
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takemyadvice1001
The Bachelorette Strayed; Should She Tell the Fiance?
help
One of my close college friends is about to get married to a mutual friend of ours–they’ve been dating since our junior year. Recently, we threw her a bachelorette party in New Orleans. She had her own room at the hotel, but the first night we went out I got ready with her, so things would move faster. After a wild night of drinks and dancing, we all stumbled home, and I realized ten or fifteen minutes later that I’d left some of my toiletries in her room.

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